Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize
