used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
