Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
