he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
porn star boner night. come get it.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
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