You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Randomize