great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Randomize
