I heard we made out
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I supernannyed him into submission
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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