she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Randomize
