when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
