nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize