just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
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