This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
