we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize