so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Randomize
