So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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