when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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