My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
We had to coat check the pizza.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize