Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
