I'm going to jail i love you
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize