but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
