I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
