he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
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