I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
