we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
You know, be my cock's hype man.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
