Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
