WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
