Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
