I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
someone get that fucking seahorse.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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