I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
Randomize
