Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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