i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
