Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
At least make sure they are 18
Why
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize