Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Randomize
