So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Randomize