He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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