I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
