Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
