I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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