Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize