I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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