Whod you bang
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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