come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
