oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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