So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
