I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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