I wish my penis had an off switch
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize