Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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