wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
they're like a gay fantastic four
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
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