Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize