So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
