I think I died a long time ago.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize